Blow Up Southtown Mall, Mayor Richard!
Posted by Doc Farmer
Wednesday, June 02, 2004
To: The Honorable Graham Richard
Mayor of Fort Wayne, Indiana
From: Doc Farmer, taxpayer, resident, author, and humorist
Subject: Southtown Mall – Disposal and Future Use
Mayor Richard,
When I was but a lad, my father retired from the U.S. Navy after 21 years of honorable service. He gathered my sisters and me around the kitchen table in our navy housing bungalow in San Diego, and told us that we were moving to Fort Wayne. I, a precocious yet brilliant child, asked what country that was in. Brilliant, yes, but I hadn’t got to the geography part of the encyclopedia yet, gimme a break....
After we moved into our first (and only) house in Fort Wayne, a big story broke. A new mall was being opened--Southtown Mall! I still remember watching the opening being covered on Channel 15 (Ken Kurtz was the anchor, if memory serves) and I recall my sisters attempting to drag my folks to this new shopping experience.
Well, over the years, the economy at the south end of Fort Wayne waned (no pun intended, I assure you), and the mall fell into decline. Finally, it just died a quiet death, an empty hulk that once housed the dreams of Orange Julius and Spencer Gift shoppers all across Allen County. It rusts, it rots, and it festers at the corner of Tillman and U.S.-27 now.
In addition, you’ve been faced with a major issue over this hulk. Namely, getting rid of it.
For some reason that I’ve yet to fathom, Southtown Mall became a city issue. You were going to get rid of that eyesore (huzzah!) and put it to some good use. As I recall, that was one of your campaign promises in your first successful run-up to the mayor’s office. However, you didn’t seem to know exactly what to do with Southtown Mall, or how you were going to get it. You also, sadly, didn’t take into account the scourge of any simple process--the blasted lawyers.
Well, you’re almost to your goal now. You’ve purchased the mall and the property, although the owner is kvetching about the price and the assessed value, which means more blasted lawyers and more delays.
I’m not knocking your decision to take Southtown Mall--it’s actually a good decision, although I think you were probably a bit too optimistic in trying to get a hold of that property in only four years’ time.
However, I do have to wonder at what you’re doing with the place. You’re planning to tear most of it down, and use the small remainder as a training facility for the cops. The training facility, that’s a good thing. But tearing it down? That’s going to cost a rather large chunk of change (taxpayer change, I might add) because of the special precautions required. All that asbestos in there will be a major pain in the rump. It’ll slow down the removal process, and it’ll be a major headache in the creation of the new training center.
May I respectfully offer you an alternative?
Leave the building intact. Don’t tear it down. You should re-pave the parking lot, granted, but that’s because it’s in such an awful state right now that it’s very difficult to do donuts in the winter there.
But what could you do with an empty mall?
Think 9/11, Mr. Mayor.
One thing that the country’s law enforcement officials are crying out for is more practical training facilities. Practical as in real life. How do you defend a mall or shopping center against terrorist attacks? Homicide bombers, car bombers, gas attacks, wackos with automatic weapons, etc. How do you train SWAT teams and regular cops on reacting and controlling critical situations in a credible and down-to-earth environment?
You have the opportunity to turn Southtown Mall from a taxpayer-cost into a revenue generator for the city. Create a police training facility there, yes, but use the entire mall. Make it a center of excellence in anti-terrorist training. Hire some Israeli cops or security experts to come in and run the joint. Have them run mock-raids, chuck stun-grenades around the place, use night-vision goggles, shoot blanks or paintballs or whatever, do mock evacuations, test tear-gas deployment, and put together a comprehensive program to defend soft targets against terrorist attack
Advertise in various trade journals used by mayors and cops. You’ll have folks flocking in from all over the Midwest to train there. At a good cost-per-head, of course. In addition, they’ll have to stay somewhere--and there are plenty of hotels in Fort Wayne. They’ll have to eat. They’ll have to shop. They’ll have to buy cheesy ''I blew up Southtown Mall in Fort Wayne Indiana, and all my friend got me was this lousy T-Shirt!'' souvenirs.
And they’ll also advance our city to others when they go back home.
America has plenty of convention centers, Memorial Coliseums, etc. How many cities have a real-life anti-terrorist training center, though? How many within 750 miles of Fort Wayne, that is?
Part of your job is to promote the city, Mayor Richard. And so far, you’ve done a pretty good job. Although you’re technically a lib/dem/soc/commie, you’re actually more conservative and businesslike than the rep/con who ran against you last November (and who, thankfully, lost). That’s why you got my vote, and the vote of a lot of other conservatives in Fort Wayne. Because you are working toward running the City like a Business. Moreover, you’re being successful in that endeavor.
I’d just like you to extend that acumen to the disposition of Southtown Mall.
I hope you’ll consider this suggestion, Mr. Mayor. Many thanks.
~~~~~oo0oo~~~~~
Doc Farmer, who used to live in the Middle East, has returned to his adopted hometown of Fort Wayne, Indiana. He receives e-mail there at: DocFarmer9999@yahoo.co.uk
This Article Was First Published In ChronWatch At: Chron Watch
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